Friday, April 9, 2010

Ninja Assassin


Tom's Corner:

Ninja Assassin
(2009, James McTiegue, director)

Excuse me for a moment while I wipe the fake blood out of my eyes.

Wow, was this movie bloody. Bloody and dark. In fact, I think they used more fake blood than a number of horror movie franchises. Written by comics and sci-fi writer J. Michael Straczynski and Matthew Sand, I at least know one of these men should have known better. Straczynski's writing has seen better days. I remember about 9 years ago or so, he took over the writing chores of Spider-Man, which at the time was an unreadable morass of unnecessary angst and plot holes wide enough for a battleship. He fixed that, and rather well. So what happened here?

This movie has some of the classic plot elements that everyone likes to overuse badly: revenge, betrayal, and the old student betrays his evil master plot device. That being said, if you want an action flick without an overabundance of snappy dialogue and no stupid 'Ha! I killed you' one liners, this may be the film for you. The throwing star thing also got old, as it appeared at times to be raining metal.

Another gripe: the love story aspect seemed tacked on. It was necessary for his betrayal, yes, but it was poorly handled. And really, two people with situs inversus? Come on, I can only suspend my disbelief so much.

In closing...don't bother. Just throw some fake blood and limbs around, and you'll get the general idea of the movie.




- Tom Trombley

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